Putting together the puzzle of life can be more complicated than you think
To make individuals' complex life puzzles work, employers must work with individual solutions
Hello, my name is Daniel
I have three children and am married to Anna. I work as a store manager, usually from eight in the morning until six in the evening. I like to bring paperwork home so that I can work after nine o'clock in the evening, when the children have fallen asleep and after Anna and I have had our chat. I think this is better than staying late at the office. Sometimes I work for a while at a café before going home.
I am a social person but avoid developing friendships at work. For me, work is one thing and social life is another. I do not want these spheres to overlap. For example, I get a discount on clothes at the store where I work, but I do not give it to my family or friends, I only use it to buy work clothes. On the other hand, I can get ideas for my job when shopping for personal needs or when on vacation abroad with the family. I also have similar shopping behaviors when selecting the new collection in the store and when buying new furniture for the house. In both cases, I create Excel tables to gather and evaluate all possibilities before making a purchase decision.
When it comes to expressing emotions, I can show the same types of emotions to my colleagues as I can to Anna: I can cry or laugh out loud in all spheres. I do not want my emotions to differ between different spheres, but when I feel stressed, I try to leave it in the sphere where it originated. When I was stressed about the home renovation last year, I took a three-minute breathing break every morning in front of the office door to leave that stress behind.
An overwhelming majority, about eighty percent, of all Swedish employees see balance between family and work as an important part of a meaningful life. At the same time, an imbalance between work and family can lead to stress and poor health for the individual, and to employers risking losing valuable expertise. Therefore, many organizations introduce policies that give employees the opportunity to choose working hours and workplace. But does this really lead to employees achieving a better balance in life? Research points in different directions here. The explanation for the mixed picture may be that life consists of more than just work and family, and that life balance is influenced by more than just time and place.
4 life spheres
Many people believe that there are more life spheres than just work and family (Friedman 2008, Languilaire 2009). In my studies, I have seen four different spheres: Family life fulfills needs for love and emotional support. The social life fulfills needs for belonging and status. Work life fulfills material needs through salary but also needs for development, at least in cases where employees see opportunities to grow. Private life allows the individual to relax; it provides recovery, energy, and strength. But activities can also fulfill different needs and will then be linked to different spheres. For example, one can go to the movies to be together with their family and feel emotional connection in a shared experience. But one can also go to the movies to relax, even if family members are present. In the first option, the movie visit is linked to the family life sphere; in the second, it is linked to the private life sphere. Life as a whole is a combination of the four different spheres. Together, they create a so-called life puzzle.
2 life puzzle strategies
Individuals seem to have two main ways of managing this life puzzle. Life spheres can be integrated (merged) or segmented (divided). Many employers see integration as positive, but from the individual's perspective, there are many who appreciate segmentation instead (see Kylin 2007). Integration and segmentation are not necessarily in opposition. On the contrary, they serve different purposes and can coexist. Segmentation is required in the short term for recovery and relaxation, while integration is required in the long term for individuals to perceive themselves as whole persons with coherent identities.
7 boundary settings
As can be seen, Daniel can segment and integrate differently in different aspects of his life, not just time and place. To manage boundaries between different spheres, individuals use seven different aspects: time, place, emotions, relationships, thoughts, behavior, and stress and energy. The different aspects lead to different boundary settings between life spheres, and how an aspect relates to a sphere guides the individual on what is permissible within a sphere:
Time. By setting time boundaries, one can identify, for example, office hours vs. free time, weekdays vs. weekends, sports time vs. cultural time, time for children vs. adult time, and so on. Daniel defines different times: work time between eight and six, family time between six and nine, and after nine o'clock, it's work time again.
Place. By setting place boundaries, one can assign different purposes to different places. They can be seen as workspaces, social places, places for family life, or private places. For Daniel, different places can be used as workspaces.
Relationships. By setting relationship boundaries, one can identify who are family members, colleagues, teammates, friends, or acquaintances. Daniel has clear boundaries, which among other things show in that he does not give discounts he received through work to others.
Emotions. By setting emotion boundaries, one can define which emotions one wants to feel and express in different spheres. Daniel wants to allow himself to feel the same way in different spheres, so he can cry, laugh, and so on in each sphere.
Thoughts. By setting thought boundaries, one can stop pondering work-related questions at home, and vice versa. For example, one only thinks about work and not about the children during the workday. Daniel gets work ideas when shopping privately and thus does not always draw a clear boundary in that case.
Behavior. By setting behavior boundaries, one can determine if a behavior can be applied in one or in different spheres, for example, having a certain leadership style at work but a different one in a nonprofit organization. Daniel has similar behavior when buying things for his job or for his family.
Stress and energy. By setting stress and energy boundaries, one can determine if, and if so, how, stress and energy coming from one sphere should be allowed to spill over into other spheres. Anna took a three-minute breathing break before arriving at work for a period to change trains of thought.
Combination of the different boundary settings leads to life spheres
A combination of the different boundary settings above can lead to
Om tid och plats vore de enda aspekterna att hantera skulle individen förhållandevis lätt kunna integrera eller segmentera sina livssfärer. Men som berättelsen om Daniel visar är situationen ofta mer komplicerad. Livspusslet handlar om att segmentera eller integrera alla sju livsaspekter för minst fyra livssfärer. Det betyder också att arbetsgivare missar något väsentligt när de bara intresserar sig för integration mellan arbete och familj genom flexibilitet i arbetstid och arbetsplats. Om det inte finns en samsyn mellan de anställda och arbetsgivaren om hur de enskilda individernas livspussel ser ut och utvecklas är det risk att de anställda känner rädsla, frustration, sorg eller oro. Det påverkar i sin tur hur organisationen fungerar. Om det däremot finns en samsyn mellan individ och organisation är det större chans att de anställda känner sig nöjda, stolta och får arbetsglädje (Languilaire 2009).
Arbetsgivarens utmaningen
Arbetsgivare står alltså inför utmaningen att förstå komplexiteten i individens livspussel i form av de fyra livssfärerna, de sju olika aspekter som individen hanterar samt det behov av integrering och segmentering som följer. Först med en sådan förståelse kan arbetsgivaren skapa en arbetssituation som respekterar individens livspussel. Strategier, policyer och praxis bör ta hänsyn till mer än arbete och familj, till mer än flexibilitet avseende tid och plats. De måste ta hänsyn till både integrering och segmentering, och de måste ses som individualiserade. Chefer bör använda utvecklingssamtal för att förstå hur varje medarbetare påverkas av sitt unika komplexa livspussel. Utifrån detta kan man sedan utveckla lösningar som är relevanta för varje anställd och som därmed också är de rätta för organisationen.
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Referenser
Friedman, S. D. (2008). Total leadership: Be a better leader, have a richer life. Boston: Harvard Business Press.
Kylin, C. (2007). Coping with boundaries: A study on the interaction between work and non-work life in home-based telework. Doktorsavhandling. Stockholm: Stockholms universitet.
Languilaire, J.-C. E. (2009). Experiencing work/non-work: Theorising individuals’ process of integrating and segmenting work, family, social and private. Doktorsavhandling. Jönköping: Jönköping International Business School.
Together, with the support of leadership, we can restore the flow to your harmonious life puzzle when it comes to your life balance.
Let's start this journey together so that first you can easily be yourself in your life puzzle, second you can easily love your life puzzle, and third you can easily breathe in and out in your life puzzle.
By simply Being, Loving, and Breathing, you can Feel free in your life puzzle and create it on your own terms to ultimately achieve a sustainable and authentic life balance.
